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At long last, the much deserved credits for development and distribution and inspiration of hiwind.bas!

many thanks to: darkknight, kai, meca, method, pen, soop

additional thanks to: bad, bong, bossman, drako, epic, exe, fantasee, fenix, few, fin, flek, foam, fone, forge, future, gate, gizmo, huc, idle, indo, layzie, liquid, masta, nemo, nemur, nitro, osb, osiris, qop, qtip, ren, sabu, sk8, todai, view

extra thanks to: all my friends (and enemies) in private rooms: clerks, test, mirage, vb3

and finally: thanks to chisox, meca, and venim for keeping me humble all these years.

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  • Table of Contents
    • Screenname: Patty
I signed on the Screename: "Patty"
I started getting tons of ims..


Royalbee7: Hi Savannah
Patty: Hi Chicago!
Patty: Behir Behir! lets get funky tonight!
Royalbee7: who is this
Patty: Jack is that you?
Patty: are you looking forward to tonight?
Royalbee7: no
Patty: remember that you have to pick up the cake at 7pm
Patty: NO!
Patty: what do you mean no!
Patty: we've been planning this for 3 years!
Patty: oh you bastard
Royalbee7: this is not jack
Patty: i stayed slim for you... cooked and cleaned for you and am carrying your child!
Patty: I am carrying your child!
Patty: thats right Jack im pregnant!
Patty: and now you just want to call the wedding off!
Patty: wait till your mother hears about this!
Royalbee7: this is not jack
Patty: Quiet! i have heard enough!
Royalbee7: hello
Patty: Goodbye Jack!
Royalbee7: this is not jack
Royalbee7: who are you
Patty: Have fun finding another girl to carry your broke ass around Jack!
Patty: with a Penis as small as yours i doubt youll ever get anyone pregnant again!
Patty: BYE!
[5minutes later]
Patty: I just called your Mother Jack! and she is furious!
Patty: i hope she ties you up to her car and drags you through the streets of Cleveland!
Patty: GOODBYE FOREVER ASSHOLE!


JayeShort: Are you home?
Patty: Jack just dumped me!
Patty: after we planned the wedding for 3 years!
Patty: How could he!
JayeShort: I don't know what you are talking about. I thought you were Patty Roach.
Patty: Roach? who are you calling a Roach!
Patty: oh you are just as bad as him!
JayeShort: I thought I was. No, I am worse.
Patty: you are banging him arent you!
Patty: you stole him from me!
Patty: i knew you were more than just his secretary!
Patty: oh wait till i get my hands on you!
JayeShort: Ofr course. Yes I stole him, doesn't matter that I am 65 years old.
Patty: oh i knew he liked em freaky!
Patty: but this is ridiculous
JayeShort: We were very inventive in the office--on the desk in the waste basket, you name it.
Patty: ok lets play that game
Patty: I know you this is Jane. I know he cheats on me with you! Well tell him this!
Patty: remember last month when John came down from Canada
Patty: and I told him we went to the movies
Patty: well..
Patty: we didnt! i did him baby! i did him crazy!
Patty: Fine take him Jane! take him. You carry his broke ass around! I've had it!


BADBELVA: hi, what are you doing?
Patty: telling my ex boyfriend off
Patty: hes an asshole
BADBELVA: which one?
Patty: Jack
BADBELVA: jack off?
Patty: the one i was getting married to tonight!
Patty: oh he was cheating on me with his secretary
Patty: i just found out
Patty: and im carrying his baby!
Patty: life couldnt get worse
BADBELVA: well its better to find out now
Patty: and here you are telling me to go "jack off"
Patty: go fuck yourself asshole
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